FRAUD ALERT: #4 Oklahoma Sooners

     

    The Sooners have started the season (3-0) and are currently in the College Football Playoff conversation. This statement could have been true four weeks ago but is fucking ridiculous to hear coming into the game against West Virginia today. Not only do I think the Mountaineers are going to win this game, I think that they will win convincingly. Let me start proving my point.

The Sooners last 3 games and their outcomes:

-Oklahoma (40) - Tulane (35)

    Tulane attempts to make a 4th quarter comeback but falls short. Should have never been that close to begin with

-Oklahoma (76) - Western Carolina  (0)

    Varsity vs Junior Varsity, not much else to say

-Oklahoma (23) - Nebraska (16)

    This is the game that really convinced me of Oklahoma's fraud status. To be fair, I really don't think Nebraska is a bad team and I am glad that they are starting to look competitive again...but come the fuck on. You cant win a game against a 2-2 team like this and consider yourself to be even close to the top of the rankings. 

In conclusion:

    Don't take this the wrong way, I'm don't think I'm hating on Oklahoma by any means, I'm just speaking the truth. Oklahoma "on paper" has as much skill as any top program in the country. I still can't rule out on Spencer Rattler making a case as a Heisman candidate, but there are just some guys playing on a different level than him and the Sooners are right now. The only thing that will convince me this weekend that the Sooners should be taken seriously for playoff contention is if Nebraska beats Michigan State CONVINCINGLY. I'm not talking about a three to ten point point spread, I'm talking major blowout to take the Spartans off their current pedestal. Nebraska has to prove something to justify Oklahoma being ranked anything higher than #10 at this point.

Prediction:

West Virginia (34) - Oklahoma (18)

Now Say Something Nice:

    I've got a phrase that a use all the time that I'm going to start adding every time a say some shitty things about anything, "Now Say Something Nice". So to say something nice about Oklahoma, D.J Graham made was of the most ridiculous interceptions I've ever seen. Forget athletic ability, that was god switching his team to Rookie difficulty in Madden for one play. 

Ferris State Bulldogs: The most Underrated Football Program in America

   

    If you are as big of a fan as DII football as I am then you're going to love this article, if not.... whatever. Ferris State University is a school located in Big Rapids Michigan. Somewhere around 14,000 students are enrolled every year in a city with a population of just over 10,000. Very small town rural feel while still being a great college to earn a degree at during the week and party on the weekends and to be honest most week days. But I'm not here to talk about campus life, I'm here to talk Football. 

    The last 10 years of Bulldog Football have been nothing short of phenomenal. The Bulldogs ended their 2011 season 6-5 barely going over .500 and not looking too impressive. Then came the addition of Head Coach Tony Annese in 2012 whose dynamic coaching and recruiting abilities has lead Ferris to currently be a Division II powerhouse. His first season with the Bulldogs resulted in a 7-4 record and a ranking of one of the top offenses in the country. The years following resulted in domination over the GLIAC (Great Lakes Intercollegiate Athletic Conference) with four conference championships between 2014 and 2019. Although each year the Bulldogs did fall short of a deep playoff run, until the 2018 season. In 2018 the Bulldogs made a run all the way into the Nation Championship where they unfortunately fell short to Valdosta State by a score of 49-47 and a final record of 15-1. 

    Notable former players currently in the NFL include: Tavierre Thomas-CB Cleveland Browns, Zach Sieler-DT Miami Dolphins, Malik Taylor-WR Green Bay Packers, and Justin Zimmer-DT Buffalo Bills. The Harlon Hill Trophy is given each year to the MVP in Division II football, pretty much the DII equivalent to the Heisman. If you want solid proof of its prestige, former NFL great Danny Woodhead won the award in 2006 and 2007. The bulldogs have had two Harlon Hill Trophy winners in the last seven years: Jason Vander laan (won in 2014 and 2015 as QB), and Jayru Campbell (won in 2018 as QB). 

    After taking a year off for COVID-19 reasons, the Bulldogs are back and just as good as ever. Currently lead by former Maryland Lacrosse great turned QB, Jared Bernhardt. Some say he is the best college athlete in the country, I say he's got some big shoes to fill to be regarded as a great BULLDOG QB. #2 Ranked Ferris State will be going into their Homecoming game this Saturday currently (3-0) to take on the Davenport University Panthers (1-2).

Prediction: Ferris 48 - Davenport 6

GO DAWGS!

Christian Mccaffrey Is Exactly Why You Didn't Want To Have The #1 Pick In Fantasy Football

    

Week 3 vs the Houston Texans: Christian Mccaffrey walked into the locker room after sustaining a hamstring injury after rushing 7 times for 31 yards and pulling in two receptions for a mere 9 yards. It is currently unknown how serious of an injury it is.

    I'm honestly so happy I didn't have the first pick in my fantasy league this year. I (unfortunately) saw this coming a mile away after last year. We all know he is one of the best RBs currently in the league and is a Fantasy Football machine. His stats two years ago during his 1000yd rushing and 1000yd receiving season were unreal. But, I knew this year would probably be different. Now he's injured and 8% to 10% of fantasy football managers are angry, but it's their fault for having the #1 pick. Shit happens and I'm very happy I drafted #10...... even though I'm currently 0-2 going into this week.

    Recap: I'm bad at Fantasy Football, but not as bad as everyone who drafted Christian Mccaffrey. Especially anyone who just recently texted me that they couldn't wait for him to average over 20pts per game a few hours before the injury. 

Kissing Children and Gut Health: A Tom Brady Story

   

This might be a crazy theory, but it kind of makes sense. Tom Brady as we all know is one of the greatest QBs of all time and has had the most successful career of any football player ever, I will not contest that nor will I address it again but..... how the hell is he still playing football? He has literally been in the league and had so much success that he could be inducted into the Hall of Fame from a careers in two separate decades, let alone whatever is coming out of a third. No person no matter how well they take care of their bodies or how fit they are should be able to sustain a career in the NFL that long. So the question becomes.....how? 

    The first possibility could be Brady's lifestyle changes throughout the years and how he created the TB12 method of hating what you eat everyday. Really Tom, no strawberries? But that answer seems too simple and unlikely, given how so many players have created their own fad diets only to still burn out when god intended them to. The second possibility could be how Brady has changed his own playstyle through the years to reduce injury and stress on his body. But, as I said, many have tried before Tom and had to succumb to father time when the time was right. 

    So how does Tom do it? The answer is Gut Health. Not to get too in depth with how it works but the gut is full of bacteria called microbiome that help break down the food in your body. There are basically two types of microbiome basically, good & bad. When the good microbiome outnumbers the bad it creates a state of equilibrium in your body that is beneficial for your stomach, intestine, heart, liver, brain, etc. This means that the more good you have the healthier and "younger" you will feel and the opposite goes for the bad. 

    It's scientifically proven that children have more good microbiome and better gut health than adults (you can see where I'm going with this). There is also a procedure where a doctor can take a sample of a healthy microbiome (poop milkshake) and transfer it to a person with an unhealthy microbiome (insert it up the butt). Where am I going with this? There is a good chance that microbiome also live inside your the mouth as it is technically connected to the stomach. So when Tom Brady kisses his kids (probably ten or more times per day) they are transferring him their good microbiome thus, keeping him in TB12 shape forever. Or at least until they all grow up and he runs out of his supply. 

Recap: Tom Brady + Kissing Kids = Healthy Gut

Rams 32 - Buccaneers 28

    

 

Matt Nagy Was Right: Red Rocket Ready

    

A few weeks ago you couldn't even name a handful of people who thought Matt Nagy was making the right move. I mean honestly, he wouldn't even let Justin Fields compete for the starting spot let alone name him the starter. It seemed like a dumb move on his part: job on the line, sub-par offense, questionable play calling. Why wouldn't he give his team the best possible option to compete? Well.... he actually did. 

    As we all know, Andy Dalton is not the greatest QB in the league and even I thought the Bears made a mistake in being the landing strip the Red Rockets touched down on. But damn, he really hasn't looked THAT bad (relative to Bears QB play). He moved around the pocket very well and was making plays. Nagy new what he had and has been trying to game plan around Dalton being the starting QB for months. I don't know about you guys, but I really don't think being a Head Coach in the NFL is that easy. He is constantly under extreme pressure from management and fans alike, and I just don't think he wanted to switch around his whole game plan to give Fields the try we all thought he deserved. 

    Unfortunately for this take, it doesn't even matter because Dalton is injured and Fields gets his first start against the powerhouse that is the Cleveland Browns. Fields may have a great career ahead of him, but there is no way Myles Garrett lets that start in Cleveland. Fields is two weeks behind the other rookie starters and that's not good considering they've been playing as such. Bears are still the Bears, Nagy is still Nagy, and the old Cleveland Brown moved to Baltimore in 1996. 

Browns 31 - Bears 16

Thursday Night Football is dead: Panthers vs Texans

     

Back in college a few of my buddies and I had a tradition of watching every Thursday night NFL game and live betting on them. I lost a (relative to a dirt poor college student) shit ton of money because of two things: I'm terrible at predicting sports outcomes, and.... I'm terrible at predicting sports outcomes. Honestly, I didn't even care. There was nothing better than guys being dudes, drinking beer, and yelling at TVs. That was college. 

    Now I work 5-7 days per week, travel 90% of the time, and sleep in shitty hotels. Spare time is a thing of the past where I actually have to schedule myself to watch football (pretty sad). So now it's the middle of the week, I'm ready to watch football, and it turns out that the prestigious Thursday night game is being played by the fucking Panthers and Texans. No offense to either team but, What The Actual Fuck NFL. Three years ago this would have been an interesting game but literally neither of these teams have a shot at doing jack shit this year. The Texans are literally a train wreck that literally won't stop catching on fire. Honestly, I don't even want to waste my time talking about that team, so, I wont. The Panthers are basically Christian Mccaffrey and some other guys that may or may not be frauds. I know I have terrible takes but there's 0% chance the game becomes anything other than CMC putting up crazy fantasy points while his team coasts behind him. 

    What I'm pretty much getting at here is that nothing special can come out of this game and anyone who thinks so is lying to themselves. Don't get me wrong I'm still a die hard fan, but this game doesn't make me feel things like it used to. No magic or feelings whatsoever. Whatever: (Panthers 24  Texans 5). Please lets see Sam Darnold get sacked for a safety, the Jets need something to be keep their spirits up.